Uhm....'sup bloggers. Y'all wanna know what I did today? I worked. Then I came home &+ we was supposed to do my hair but Chrissy was trippin so now we're gonna do it in the morning, cus what if she oversleeps, or I oversleep, or we both oversleep? I mean, I know y'all know how black Easter Sundays work. I can't be lookin raggedy. That's against all the rules. If everything works out, I'ma take hella pictures. You'll see && stuffs.

So uhm, yesterday (Friday) one of my dogs died. It was grimey, cus my aunt just took him to the vet and had him put down, and she didn't tell anybody till after. Well no, I can't say that, that makes it sound grimier than it actually was. Last summer, the dog (Dempsey), bit my little brother last summer. We still don't know what happened, cus Jon wouldn't say anything (which leads me to believe it wasn't entirely the dog's fault), but the parents weren't having it. The dog bit one of the babies, he had to go. Of course, they didn't immediately just jump to have him put down, they were looking for a home for him, but he was a pit bull/dalmation mix with a history of aggressive behavior, and all the homes said they couldn't take him. They basically said that the only people who would take him would probably be Mexicans who'd use him in dog fights. So our options were pretty much to have him put down at the vet, or to send him to torture.

Anyway, we were stalling, 'cus nobody wanted to put him down. But, as you may or may not know, once aggressive behavior starts in pits, it doesn't stop. He started getting aggressive towards the baby, growling at people for no apparent reason, just being downright mean. So, the other day, my aunt decided we couldn't wait anymore, and she took him to the vet, and just did it.

That's not the part that gets to me though. The other dog, Darwin, he's the younger, and the furthest thing from a fighter you've ever seen. Though you wouldn't know it to look at him, that dog is fucking huge, we swear he's part horse, with this deep ass baritone bark and fucking fangs for teeth, but he's nothing but a big puppy. And he's just fucking lost with Dempsey. Like, he keeps looking around the house for him. Tonight I took him out for his walk, and he just kept howling and barking, like Dempsey's just lost somewhere, and Darwin's trying to find him. It's breaking my heart, really.

Which leads me to another thing I've been thinking about: Isn't it funny how love doesn't stop when the thing that you love stops? Like, I hate being at funerals and hearing people say shit like, "you must have loved him very much." Have loved? Past tense? It didn't shut off. It didn't go anywhere. Like, I know it might not make logical sense, but y'all all know what I mean. When a person dies, you continue loving them the same way you did, because the emotion was too big and uncontrollable to shut be stopped. So I think, instead of hate, grief is the opposite of love, I think grief is what happens when love figures out the thing it loves is never coming back. It's just as big and uncontrollable, and it hurts.

Anyway, this is starting to depress me, and that wasn't the purpose of this blog at all. Lol, I'ma go bother Cody, maybe finish this book. I need to go to sleep, so I don't have to look like a poodle at church tomorrow.

Till next time: positive energy, high hopes, love♥