So I'm doing my usual blog lurking, right? And my iTunes, which is on shuffle, decides it really likes Drake in this particular moment, so it starts on a little marathon. I don't mind. This nigga punchlines make me giggle, so sure. But somebody tell me why every single blog I've been on today had a Drake song playing? Uptown, Sooner Than Later, fucking Best I Ever Had is about to make me insane, The Calm, Successful...Okay, okay, nigga, we get it. I mean yeah, okay, he's good, but calm the hell down people. He's not even that good. Like really, I was gonna put Houstalantavegas on my Blogger playlist and now I hella don't want to. I hate predictability. Don't you hate predictability?

*Do Not Read The Following*

I've been thinking. Well, I was reading a book. I was reading Angels & Demons by Dan Brown, the same dude that wrote Da Vinci Code if you didn't know, the movie's coming out soon, so I was reading it. Anyway, the book was talking a lot about antimatter, and how its like a billion times more powerful than regular, good old fashioned matter, but scientists have no idea why.

And so you know, being me, that got my little mind working. 'Cause, I mean, isn't it like that with everything? I mean, maybe not scientifically, like with antimatter, but think about it. The things you don't say will always have more power than the things you say, simply because you don't say them. Which is why when people say something, or do something, completely out of character, it's taken seriously, because it's not normal. So why would it be any different with matter. I mean, if we're all made up of matter, like, everything, then why would our interactions as matter based organisms differ any of the interactions of actual raw particles of matter?

Okay. I'm done being a dork. It's just been on my mind, since I finished the book.

*You May Continue Reading*

So, we joined a new church today. We being me, mom, Ree, & Jon. The old one just didn't feel right. I don't expect anybody to understand that. A lot of people think church is supposed to feel uncomfortable, which isn't true. Not for me anyway. If I'm in the right church, I've always been able to feel at home there. Like myself. I'm not one of those people that acts totally different in church than I do on the street. I'm pretty much the same in both places. I dont' know if that means I'm bad in church or good on the street, but whatever.

The reason I brought it up is 'cause their choir is awful. The poor babies. I like, cringe when they go up to sing on Sundays. My big brother Mike's new fiance* (remind me to talk about that later) is the choir director, so she like, attacked me after church today, like "Ashley! We need you! Tuesday night at seven!" And because I'm semi known in this city, it's no suddenly pretending like I can't sing. It's not that I want to say no, I love singing. Especially in choirs. And it's not even that the choir's bad, really. I don't mind that. They're a small choir, and all the need is good guidance. That's what bothers me. They don't have good guidance. And I'll be damned if they expect me to come in there and be their good guidance. I don't like assuming leadership positions around people I don't know like that. Does that make any sense?

This is getting long, isn't it?

Okay, last thing. My big brother Mike proposed to his girlfriend Dauvia two weeks ago. Mike's 20, his birthday's in May. Dauvi's 19, her birthday's in June. They've already got a date set for late August.

Does anybody remember the pregnancy blog? I feel kinda the same way about marriage out here. People get married madd young. Like, I don't know, it's probably the way I was raised, but I know how to be in a relationship without having to get married. I'd have no problem living with a dude for some years without even thinking about marriage. Don't get me wrong, I do want to get married, but when I'm older. Maybe 26 or 27. 24 is honestly the earliest I'd even consider it. I think people get married so early out here 'cus there's nothing else to do. That's me and moms theory.

Okay! I'ma shuttup. I've got more to say, but y'all ain't even listenin anymore, so what's the point. I think I'm going to take some initiative && go do the educated guess blog. Don't ask, you'll see.

Till Then,
-A.