I'm so glad yall don't take the time to actually figure out what's going on in my head. If you did, I don't know if you could even stomach what you saw. You ever wonder what's behind all the smiles and hugs and rainbows? All the pet names and perceptiveness and good advice and pep talks? Nothing. There's nothing there. It's hollow. I honestly don't even have it in me to care about half the shit you say to me. Y'all steady talking, and it's cute to me because you seem to think I'm really listening. Why would I do that? Please tell me why I would take the time out of my life to give half a flying fuck whats the matter with you? You don't know anything about me. You're shit to me. The responses you get from me are automatic. A product of good training. It's genius actually. 'Cause you thought I cared. That's just precious, really. I'm wearing a mask for yall. And I keep it on so long I can't remember what my face looks like under it. But that's okay, cus it's not like anybody's inviting me to take it off. It's not like yall really give a shit. You get your sunshine and rainbows and I get nothing. And thats okay.

And one day I'll just disappear, and you'll find someone else to give you smiles and hugs and rainbows. Good advice and pep talks. And thats okay too.

-A.