Its 2 o clock in the morning, so forgive me if I ramble, or misspell words, or have bad grammar. Keep in mind that I don't actually have anything important to say, depending of course on your definition of important, so if you've never been a fan of the rambling blogs, you should probably skip this one.

Whats up Shani? You & Zula have become like, my two most faithful blog readers. Don't trip Danny, Sam, I know yall still around. You just show it differently. Zula & Shani comment. Daniel turns some shit from my blog into his stat on Y! like a black person. The duck wasn't even that good, by the way. Thats gay, right? Yeah, son, thats what I said. The rest of it was bomb though.

I'm moving back to California in the beginning of February. I start school out there on Valentines. Made this decision without consulting my mom, so she's kind of in a tizzy. Oops? I wasn't thinking when I made the arrangements. I know that sounds impossible, but it was really, impulsive. I did it all last night. Almost exactly twenty four hours ago actually. I just...did it. Its not hard. An online application here, a well placed email there, & boom. She's registered for school start February 14 2009. She's got a place to stay, financial aid, and a job.

I bet you're wondering, if its that easy, why the hell I've been out here for so long. The answer being, my family found my weak spot & pushed on that shit. Thats what sucks about having geniuses as family members. These motherfuckers told me my happiness and success didn't have anything to do with where I was, it was just me. I was just unhappy. I was just unsuccessful. Oh. They told me when I could be happy and successful where I was, then I could be happy and successful anywhere, and they'd let me go.

But, approximately twenty four hours ago, something hit me. The word "let". Hold the fuck up. I pay bills around here. You don't let me do shit. I do what I want. I mean that in the least temper tantrum throwing way humanly possible. I do what my mother asks out of respect for her. Not because she deserves it (sounds harsh, but its true), not because I'm scared of her, not because I'm afraid she'll kick me out. I do what she says because theres no reason for me not to. It makes life easier, everybody's pleased, so why not.

But the fact of the matter is, I'm not happy here. Its not me. Its here. When I was flat broke in LA, I was happy. I had friends, I had good grades, I had a hustle, I had my city. I was happy. Broke as hell and happy. I got out here and started fucking up. Nothing to do. Nowhere to go. No one who understood. And I'm not happy here. And why should I try to force myself to be happy here, when I know I could be happy there? Souds bullshitty to me. How bout you?

So I'm moving. At least thats the plan as of *looks at watch* now. And thats the most groundbreaking event in my life. Anything ground breaking going on in your life? You should tell me about it.

Oh, and randomly, I'd like to let you all know, that since Thanksgiving has officially passed, I start my birthday countdown on Monday, December 1st. So if you start to see random numbers in my stats, or in the blog somewhere, thats what that is, and so you'll have absolutely no excuse not to tell me happy birthday.

The end.

-A.